Why, exactly, are so many people -- especially, although not exclusively lawyers -- afraid of truly being themselves?
In the years since I began deciding to live the life I was meant to live, to follow the Call and stop living as another faceless, anonymous "suit," toiling away and forgotten the moment I was gone, I've thought about this with intense focus.
Why We Cover the Inner Mirror
To some extent, I feared the risk of a financial "haircut," and what that would mean for the comfort and ease my existing paycheck brought me.
On the one hand, research has shown that individuals perceived as bold and distinctive are more consistently seen as having innate leadership abilities and higher degrees of confidence and competence. And in the entrepreneurial or thought leadership space, a lack of dynamism, charisma, and strong differentiation can be the financial kiss of death.
On the other hand, staying in the sun's orbit rather than being the sun, meant (I thought) I'd be less likely to be fired, professionally blindsided, and/or broke, a risk high-level leaders and entrepreneurs everywhere always face.
I also, in a big way, feared the spotlight itself. What If I failed? What if I had the last word in a significant decision and it went wrong, forcing me to take the blame? What if, without the safety net of a boss, I made a mistake in a brief or a lease review, infuriating my client? What if I was on camera somewhere, or before legislators or another group of influential people, and misspoke? How would I survive the humiliation?
Subconsciously, the biggest fear of all was how to discover who and what the real me was. Having been told by others who "Scott Mason" was -- a good student, a solid lawyer who would never be more, the guy who was "weird" -- I had no idea how even to imagine how to be, let alone actively become, something else.
It's a Journey -- and One Leg Matters the Most
The truth is this: with guidance, support, and commitment, every last person who feels the Call can figure out what it is. Understanding that accepting help from mentors, coaches, confidantes, or others who have stepped where you're looking to go -- as a fearless law practice leader, founder of your own law firm, creative entrepreneur, food manufacturer, college professor, or anything else -- can provide you with the process to build a self-understanding sufficient to uncloud your Call and put together an actionable plan to make it happen.
BUT, as I've discovered, taking those steps, and even beginning to follow the plan, isn't enough.
Just as paint-by-numbers isn't truly impactful art, following a roadmap to a professional vision won't guarantee success until you, deep inside, OWN it.
That is the leg of the odyssey that matters the most. Doing that, being the person who lives out that call, was for me -- and so many others -- the unspoken fear behind all of the other fears ... and the hardest step to take, by far.
You Are Not Alone
Throwing aside the stories behind my fears, what I call the Five Toxic Myths, helped me begin that leg of the journey. I had been coaching/consulting and speaking for years before I dared move beyond my financial concerns, image-consciousness, and other fears to throw down the gauntlet, shove my reservations to the wind, and own being 100%, fully, "Scott"—to wholly and boundlessly live as the Myth Slayer, irrespective of failure or anything else.
It didn't take a day. Going deeper and deeper into it is work I still engage in right now, to this day.
Sometimes, my heart wants to stop when I think about taking another step toward showing the world my true message, my real face, and the full breadth of my need to fulfill my Call.
I beg, plead, and even cry to the universe to take me back to what I was before.
But then, my hand holding those who are there for me, who believe and care, I still leap forward.
And you can, too.
The Twist Ending
Oddly enough, the more intensely I've leaned into "Scott," the more support I find. The further I pull away from identities that the Toxic Myths pushed me into, the more professional opportunities pop out of the air. The more I find myself, the more the world finds me.
That is the twist ending of my story, and what will be the twist ending of yours. The Toxic Myths aren't just sad personal narratives. They are outright lies.
And once a lie is exposed to the sun, what it was can never be unseen.
In my recent TEDx talk at Boston University, I discussed the Greek myth of Achilles as a parable for my own story, and for anyone who wants to be something more than they are now: a leader, an entrepreneur, or maybe something altogether different. You can watch it HERE. If you enjoy it, please share it with a friend.
Oh, and if the ending is dramatic, well, that's because taking a deep breath, fully shaking in fear, then stepping into the glory beyond is dramatic.
And, I promise, a story climax worth living.
I want your future to be EPIC!
I'm Scott Mason, The Myth Slayer. I am an attorney and former C-Suite executive, coach, speaker, podcaster, and Master of the Mythic. I graduated from Columbia Law School and have spent years drawing on the full depth of a background spanning the private, public, and nonprofit sectors to provide lawyers feeling stuck or stagnant in their careers or as leaders with a unique (and fun!) system to help them live a life that's epic.
Click here to discover more about me, my mission, and how it can help you.
If you've ever said, "I'm capable of more -- and I want it?" ... then download my five-minute self-assessment, and I'll show you how to elevate your leadership, increase your impact, and find your powerhouse personal voice NOW!
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